LATE SHOW NEWS #163 July 29, 1997 by Aaron Barnhart NOTE: This issue is rated L for language and M for mail -- four cartons of mail that greeted me on my return from California. In Pasadena, Rick Ludwin and I had our semi-annual chat, and NBC's top late-night executive confirmed for me what many of you have come to suspect: that "Later" will remain a wee-hours venue for talk-show host wannabes and will not appoint a permanent host. Ludwin said a rotating lineup of guest hosts will continue for the indefinite future, since "Later" has shown no ratings erosion (indeed, modest ratings *gain*) in the months following Greg Kinnear's departure. Fresh episodes begin airing next Monday ... I attended two tapings in Hollywood that couldn't have been more different. First I saw the prime-time "Politically Incorrect" that aired live last Thursday, with the hyped-up crowd and a warmup guy named Larry who tells jokes during *every* commercial break. The reason for this, executive producer Scott Carter said, is so the four guests can concentrate on the next segment without feeling like the audience is bearing down on them with 200 sets of eyeballs. I did, however, notice panelist Jon Stewart actually enjoying some of Larry's jokes, or rather, being Stewart, he might have been enjoying how much mileage Larry seemed to be getting out of such old material. The second was a "Dennis Miller Live" where the "warmup" guy, and I use the term loosely, more or less sauntered onto stage, explained the show in the least enthusiastic terms allowed by the union, showed a clip reel and then said okay, people, we're on in 30 seconds. Not surprisingly, Miller enjoyed playing to his mellow, unlathered audience as much as Maher enjoyed playing to the bloodthirsty masses in his faux Roman Colosseum ... Did I mention that "Dennis Miller Live" now tapes out of the same studio where "The Price Is Right" is recorded? Did I mention that this week's guests are the Odenkirk boys from HBO's "Mr. Show"? I did now ... Marilyn Sargent has updated her "Pathetic Person of the Month" and it includes a picture of our two favorite dueling billboards. It's a keeper! ... Chris Elliott has joined the cast of "The Naked Truth," which guarantees him another six to nine months of employment ... Tim Meadows denied to the Chicago Sun-Times (specifically, our pal and longtime reader Darel Jevens) that he's leaving "SNL," even though he was left off a cast list circulated by Lorne Michaels at the TCA tour two weeks ago. Whether the list was incomplete, or Tim's in denial, we should know soon ... "Mystery Science Theater 3000" has been renewed for a ninth season by the Sci-Fi Channel, where 13 new episodes will appear in early 1998 ... "The Chris Rock Show" and "Mr. Show" will return for a new season starting Sep. 12 on HBO ... And there's a cover story on Conan O'Brien at Yahoo! Internet Life . *** Reader mail: Rev. Gregory Dwyer writes, "Anytime I go back to New York, I stop into the Hello Deli and Rupert knows me by name and makes me feel right at home. Rupert is down to earth. I think that is why Dave has him on the show" ... Kathryn Saxon reminds me that "The Ambiguously Gay Duo" were not even pathbreakers on "SNL"; before them there was Lyle Billup, the Effeminate Heterosexual, played by Dana Carvey ... Darren Glass writes, "One must wonder what THE DAILY SHOW has done to offend you. None of the episodes made your TOP 80 list, it has fallen out of being listed on the lineups," etc. Hang on, Darren, and remember this isn't my day job. For one thing, Sarah Tanz, the Comedy Central publicist on whom I was dependent for my Daily Show lineups, has left. So yours truly needs to begin shopping the comcentral.com Web site, something you'll notice I did this week. For another thing, no one, not one person, nominated any "Daily Show" episodes for this list. The only episodes that made the list got *two* votes, and I would've been happy to second any especially entertaining episode that my readers had nominated (hint hint) ... Reminder! The alert Chris Neuman writes, "Canadian viewers and others who receive the CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp) can catch 'The Late Shift' this Wednesday at 8:30 (9:00 in Newfoundland, who insist on being different)" ... Rejoinder! Elizabeth Philippus fires back after reader Diane Lehwald's complaint about Mary Tyler Moore's "Late Show" appearances. "Mary ALWAYS gives a great interview, which means Diane obviously sizes people up by their looks and what their wearing. I personally didn't even notice that she was doing anything of the sort because she tells such fascinating true stories about her life and what she has been doing verses just beating around a bush and acting like a giddy child or just plain STUPID like alot of Dave's female guests. I think Diane needs to pick up Mary Tyler Moore's book, 'After All,' and she might just come to terms as to why Mary *might* act the way Diane perceives her." *** SCUSE ME WHILE I KICK THE SKY (YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH) [ A shorter version of this story appeared in the July 28 edition of The Kansas City Star. ] They were two of the strangest hours in the history of television. They happened exactly five years apart, and on the same show, and to the same man. And as the years increase between us and those two notorious nights, you have to wonder if TV -- a medium that seems more tightly controlled and predictable than ever -- will see many more moments like them again. Fifteen years ago, on July 28, 1982, David Letterman put on a talk show, and a wrestling match broke out. Andy Kaufman, a singular figure in entertainment whose antics both on and off the tube were already legendary, struck a blow for performance art, or rather received one, when he was clobbered by pro wrestler Jerry Lawler during a taping of Letterman's new late-night talk show on NBC. On the same date in 1987, Letterman himself was in the line of fire as a segment with the actor Crispin Glover disintegrated into a kicking exhibition, with one foot coming very near Letterman's pricey head. To this day, no one is really sure how much of either incident was staged or spontaneous. But the four players had in common -- Glover and Lawler, Letterman and Kaufman -- were not naive. They knew that few things in life are more staged than a television broadcast. Yet they surely realized there is no more effective or compelling theater than the live TV show where all of the elements are in perfect harmony. Or in the case of these two shows, perfect discord. *** Andy Kaufman didn't believe in traditional standup comedy; that was his gift and his burden. An accomplished standup from the age of 9, Kaufman as an adult became fascinated with getting more out of his audiences than reactions to punchlines. He began to perform as his own warmup act, creating separate alter egos and playing them to the hilt. One was Tony Clifton, a malevolent lounge singer who verbally abused his audience and often refused to do his act. Kaufman treated Clifton as a separate person and would go ballistic any time someone suggested that the two were the same man. He even arranged for Clifton to have his own guest appearance on ``Taxi,'' the sitcom that made Kaufman famous. The shows never got taped because Clifton made an ass of himself on the set and was finally dragged off by studio guards, cursing and yelling at the director, ``You'll never work in Vegas again!'' TV didn't know what to do with Kaufman. Eventually he would be asked not to return to ``SNL.'' And in 1981, on the live late-night program ``Fridays'' on ABC, Kaufman systematically sabotaged every sketch by forgetting his lines, uttering new lines, or behaving erratically. No one on the show was expecting this, except for a couple of producers, and certainly no one was amused by it. Toward the end of the show, a fight broke out on national TV when few frustrated cast members lunged at Kaufman in mid-sketch. Meanwhile off the screen, Kaufman was establishing himself as the world's premier ``inter-gender wrestler.'' From 1979 to 1983 he took on hundreds of women in the ring. As was his wont, Kaufman specialized in alienating crowds before and during the fight, ensuring that they would be completely behind for the woman, whom Kaufman would then proceed to beat handily. A feud broke out between Kaufman and a male wrestling champion named Jerry Lawler that resulted in a grudge match, which Lawler won easily. Kaufman wound up in traction. Thus set the stage for what transpired on ``Late Night with David Letterman'' on July 28, 1982. Letterman hadn't been on the air six months in late night, but had hosted dozens of ``Tonight Show'' broadcasts and, briefly, his own morning show on NBC. Like Kaufman, he was already beginning to tire of the conventional format that entertainers in his line of work were expected to follow -- in Letterman's case, that meant the talk show format modeled by ``Tonight.'' The two men also led intensely private lives off-stage, which may explain why Letterman had an affinity for Kaufman and seemed to know what frequency he operated on. So when he invited Kaufman and Lawler to discuss their feud on the show, Letterman was well aware what might happen. Like Kaufman, he was conducting experiments on his audience for their own sake. Professional wrestling fans are used to seeing grown men pull each other's hair out on stage, but not on NBC, before a hip studio audience and a mild-mannered TV host. Sure enough, the segment quickly broke down into insults. Kaufman taunted Lawler relentlessly, raising the big man's blood pressure by the minute. As Letterman tried to cut to a commercial, Lawler rose from his chair and clocked Kaufman on the head, sending him sprawling. After the break, an enraged Kaufman swore a blue streak at Lawler (which, of course, was bleeped) and tossed hot coffee in his face. Lawler bounded out of his seat and chased Kaufman from the studio. A satisfied Letterman simply shook his head and ad-libbed, ``You can use *some* of those words, but I've said it time and time again, you can't throw coffee.'' After it was over, NBC considered banning Kaufman from appearing on any of its shows; Kaufman responded with an impossible, $200 million lawsuit against the network. In less than two years Kaufman would be dead of a rare strain of lung cancer, despite the fact that he reportedly never smoked. It was the kind of demise so bizarre that some thought it to be concocted -- Kaufman's latest ruse. Some even thought that Kaufman, like Elvis Presley, had not really died. Alas, there have been no new Andy Kaufman sightings since. *** By 1987, Letterman's anti-show had become *the* show. Interviews became sparring matches, and guests who couldn't roll with the punches were flattened by a Letterman put-down, or had their segment abruptly TKOed. But even this ritual wasn't immune from self-effacement: One of the show's writers, Chris Elliott, routinely barged in during the broadcast to make Letterman's life, as Elliott liked to put it, ``a living hell.'' Although the best moments of Letterman's shows are often unprepared, the host demands that each broadcast be elaborately mapped out in advance. Those now-famous blue index cards Letterman uses contain not only vital information gleaned from the ``pre-interviews'' done with the show's producers, they even include ad libs suitable to the topics host and guest plan to discuss. Of course, Letterman is free to use or ignore this material however he pleases once the cameras start rolling, and that is the significant difference between a Letterman show and that of his onetime guest, now archrival, Jay Leno. Letterman's mood plays a surprisingly large role in determining a show's outcome. If he feels the audience isn't in the palm of his hand, he broods for the entire program. If the jokes resonate with the audience, the show can feel lighter than air and even become a classic, even after multiple replays. Letterman was entering that stage of his career that devotees would later admiringly call his ``fat and sour period.'' He put on a good 30 pounds and had broken up with his longtime girlfriend, and the show's onetime head writer, Merrill Markoe. Women in particular seemed to catch him in a foul mood. He tore Parade magazine know-it-all Marilyn vos Savant to shreds, and Shirley MacLaine and Cher both called him an unprintable name during their segments. But was Letterman truly unhappy, or was this a new character he was trying out? As was the case with Kaufman, it was hard to say for sure. At the time of his guest appearance, Crispin Glover was best known as Michael J. Fox's father in ``Back to the Future.'' He had been booked on ``Late Night'' to promote his new film, ``River's Edge.'' Already Glover was known as an odd bird, although he lacked the self-destructive gene found in young rebels like Sean Penn and Robert Downey Jr. After he was introduced, Glover stepped out, but instead of facing the audience, had his back turned and arms extended, as if bickering with someone backstage. That night he had on funky trousers with stripes of varying width, enormous platform shoes and a short-sleeved button-down shirt. He was carrying a briefcase, whose purpose was never fully explained. His hair was disheveled. And he was extremely nervous. From the start, the audience could not control itself over the sight of Glover. ``Nice shoes!'' yelled women in the audience, as the show's director, Hal Gurnee, zoomed in for a close-up shot of Glover's cloppers. Things went downhill fast from there. Glover produced a wad of newspaper clippings about himself and began reading incoherent fragments from them. ``They said, `Crispin Glover was pinstriped and greased up for the occasion, impressing the girl thangs who were trying to get next to him. Guess some people are turned on by Brylcreem,' '' Glover stammered. ``You seem to be distraught,'' said Letterman, not really knowing -- or caring -- why. ``People seem to make me seem a lot weird,'' Glover whined. ``And I'm just -- I'm strong, you know.'' He flexed his right bicep manfully. ``I'm strong. I can arm wrestle. Do you want to arm wrestle?'' Letterman declined. Glover stood up. ``I've been taking... These are mine... I can kick!'' And with that he hi-karated straight at Letterman. Whether the kick came near his head is in dispute, but to the viewers that night, it looked like an awfully close shave. Without missing a beat, Letterman excused himself and began to head for the exit. Glover reached across the desk and grabbed weakly at the hem of Letterman's blazer. But he got away, and as the show went to commercial, the camera closed in on a bereft Glover. When the break ended, Letterman was back in his desk and the guest was gone. ``I think that's the first time since we've been doing the show that a guest actually tried to kick me,'' Letterman said. ``He came very close to denting my head with those giant shoes. So I thought, I don't need that. I'm 40. I went to college. That is not how I want my life ended, some goofball, some dork from wherever'' -- The audience began to boo Letterman. ``Oh, stop it!'' he shouted. ``Do you want to have dinner with the guy?'' The audience burst into cheers and applause. *** In the decade that has transpired since the ``Glover boot,'' Letterman's act has supplanted Johnny Carson's as the convention by which all shows -- not least of all ``The Tonight Show,'' the show Letterman was not allowed to inherit -- are now measured. After spending the 1980s mucking around at the boundary that separates reality from illusion, Letterman has pulled back, and the boundaries have contracted once more. For most of his four seasons on CBS, Letterman has cultivated a game-show atmosphere: volume on high, crowds on screaming and guests way too pepped up for the 10:30 hour. In his old NBC digs, awkward silence was part of the schtick; but in the vaster Ed Sullivan Theater, it's an embarrassing hole the audience feels compelled to fill with laughter or, worse, applause. In recent years, a few celebrities have conspired to look unhinged on Letterman's program more or less on purpose, including Sharon Stone, James Caan and, most recently, Farrah Fawcett, who at one point in the program stared dreamily at the skyline behind Letterman's desk, thinking (or pretending to think) it was an actual 50th-story view over Manhattan. But in general there is less aberrant behavior on Letterman's show because so much is at risk. Unlike in 1982 or 1987, dozens of alternatives are just a channel-change away should a given segment go awry. A failed segment can be grist for Letterman's lightning-fast mind -- but then again, it can simply be a failure. Glover is now a successful character actor. His much-acclaimed part in David Lynch's ``Wild at Heart'' was instrumental in the film's victory at the 1990 Cannes Film Festival. Glover also speaks on the college lecture circuit and fields the inevitable questions from kids too young to remember that night in July when he took one small step for man, one giant leap for classic TV. And somewhere, no doubt, Andy Kaufman's in a wrestling match. Tom Heald's THIS NIGHT IN HISTORY Tu 7/29: In 1983, "Friday Night Videos" premieres on NBC, with no veejays or on-camera host, just the voice of Nick Michaels. (The celebrity guest hosts don't show up until 1985.) In the first national "Video Vote" (via 900 number), Duran Duran's "Hungry like the Wolf" trounces David Bowie's "Let's Dance" by 59,000 to 37,000 calls. We 7/30: In 1950, Frank Stallone is born, allowing "Saturday Night Live's" Norm McDonald a punchline for what seems like every other joke during the '95-'96 and '96-'97 seasons. Th 7/31: In 1991, for the first time, the entire "Late Night with David Letterman" program is broadcast live on the Sony Jumbotron at Times Square. Fr 8/1: In 1986, the talk show "Max Headroom" starring Matt Frewer as M-M-M-M-Max Headroom debuts on (where else) Cinemax. Sa 8/2: In 1985, "ABC Rocks" last airs, after proving itself no match for NBC's "Friday Night Videos." Su 8/3: In 1979, Burbank, California salutes Johnny Carson by putting him on the cover of the Burbank telephone directory. Mo 8/4: In 1986, on "Late Night with David Letterman," Letterman takes a shower with audience volunteer Elise Lark. Concerned that perhaps a little too much of Elise was seen on camera, the show is never rebroadcast. [Thanks to the usual suspects: Brooks, Marsh, and Tanny. Special thanks to Donz5, who taught Dorf everything he knows about water sports.] [S-ubb-end m-ubb-ail t-ubb-oo T-ubb-om H-ubb-eald Ubb-at Tomalhe@aol.com. Anyone else hear PBS might be bringing back "Zoom!"?] THE LINEUPS with Sue Trowbridge LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN, CBS Tu 7/29 Norm MacDonald, Phylicia Rashad, Jamiroquai We 7/30 Charles Grodin, Billy Connolly, David Byrne Th 7/31 Julia Roberts, Jonathan Katz, Blues Traveler Fr 8/1 Tony Danza, Michael Rappaport, Todd Barry Mo 8/4 Bob Dole, Bill Bellamy, Ziggy Marley & the Melody Makers Tu 8/5 Ray Liotta, Natalie Deselle, David Brenner We 8/6 Jay Thomas, Anabella Sciorra, Tonic Th 8/7 Sylvester Stallone, Tommy Lasorda, Bev Tanner Fr 8/8 Demi Moore, Jay Mohr, Aerosmith THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JAY LENO, NBC Tu 7/29 Spencer Breslin, Carroll O'Connor, Kenny Loggins We 7/30 Angela Bassett, 101 yr. old ballroom dancer Lenore Schaeffer, Lisa Stansfield Th 7/31 Alice Cooper, Dennis Miller, iguana expert Joleen Lutz Fr 8/1 Glenn Close, Anna Kournikova, Dwight Yoakam Mo 8/4 Sylvester Stallone, Venus Williams, Lance Burton Tu 8/5 Mira Sorvino, Jonathan Taylor Thomas, watermelon eating champ Chris Meyer We 8/6 Shaquille O'Neal, Emil Popescu and performing sea lions Th 8/7 TBA Fr 8/8 Jennifer Aniston, Earvin 'Magic' Johnson Mo 8/11 Charlie Sheen, John Fogerty Tu 8/12 Lisa Kudrow, Jake Johannsen, Natalie Cole LATE LATE SHOW WITH TOM SNYDER, CBS Tu 7/29 Liza Minnelli, Brett Butler We 7/30 Marcia Clark, Peter Fonda Th 7/31 Michael Jeter LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN O'BRIEN, NBC Tu 7/29 Scott Thompson, Rebecca Lobo We 7/30 Martin Sheen, Judith Martin, Steve Miller & Curtis Salgado Th 7/31 Kevin Bacon, Rickie Lee Jones Fr 8/1 D.B. Sweeney Mo 8/4 Marisa Tomei, Eugene Levy, The Reverend Horton Heat (R 1/10/07) Tu 8/5 John Leguizamo, Mary Black We 8/6 Garth Brooks, Brian Williams LATER, NBC Tu 7/29 Dave Chappelle with Steven Wright (R 5/22/97) We 7/30 Dave Chappelle with John Salley (R 5/19/97) Th 7/31 Dave Chappelle with Jonathan Katz Mo 8/4 Duane Martin with Eddie Griffin Tu 8/5 Duane Martin with Reggie Theus We 8/6 Duane Martin with Wes Craven Th 8/7 Duane Martin with the Captain & Tennille CHARLIE ROSE, PBS Tu 7/29 Liggett Tobacco Chairman Bennet Lebow; Mexico City Mayor Elect Cuauhtémoc Cárdenas; photographer Larry Fink We 7/30 Young MacArthur Award Recipients; White House Fellowship Panel Th 7/31 Hearst Magazines President Cathleen Black Fr 8/1 Squirrel Nut Zippers Mo 8/4 Mike Leigh Tu 8/5 MCI's Vint Cerf We 8/6 TBA Th 8/7 Itzhak Perlman, John Williams; Cop Land Panel POLITICALLY INCORRECT WITH BILL MAHER, ABC Tu 7/29 Phil Hartman, Merrill Markoe, Jerry Yang, Clifford Stoll We 7/30 Dave Foley, Anthony LaPaglia, Telma Hopkins, Michael Medved Th 7/31 Primetime Edition 1: Marilyn Manson, G.Gordon Liddy, Lakita Garth, Florence Henderson Th 7/31 Primetime Edition 2: Joe Mantegna, Rebecca De Mornay, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Emme Th 7/31 French Stewart, Kate Mulgrew, Jenica Bergere, Joseph Califano Fr 8/1 Norman Mailer, Luke Perry, Caroline Rhea, Lakita Garth (*again?*) THE DAILY SHOW, Comedy Central Tu 7/29 Janeane Garofalo We 7/30 Sugar Ray Leonard Th 7/31 Ben Stein And *no,* I'm not going to start listing WIN BEN STEIN'S MONEY on the late-night roster below. I draw the line at ex-Nixon speechwriter's game shows! SPACE GHOST COAST TO COAST, Cartoon Network Fr 8/1 Beck ** premiere ** Fr 8/8 Judy Tenuta, Bobcat Goldthwait ** premiere ** HOWARD STERN, E! Tu 7/29 Noel Gallagher, Oasis; Alec Baldwin , Pt. 2 We 7/30 Singing Playmate, Pt. 1, Chynna Phillips, Pt. 1 Th 7/31 Singing Playmate, Pt. 2, Chynna Phillips , Pt. 2 Fr 8/1 Singing Playmate, Pt. 3, Kenneth Keith's Acting Debut Sa 8/2 Susan's Playboy Evaluation, Maniac Fan DIE HARALD SCHMIDT SHOW, SAT.1 29.07 Georg Uecker, Rudolf Scharping 30.07 Andy Borg, Arabella Kiesbauer 31.07 Toni Schumacher, Maren Kroymann 1.08 Marcel Reich Ranicki, Naomi Campbell ... then Harald and the gang will take four weeks off! Also on late nights: NIGHTLINE, ABC CHARLES GRODIN, CNBC CARSON'S COMEDY CLASSICS, Family Channel MAD TV, Fox SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE, NBC (this season) and Comedy Central (classics) THE RUPAUL SHOW, VH1 LOVELINE, MTV ODDVILLE MTV, MTV WORLD NEWS NOW, ABC UP TO THE MINUTE, CBS NIGHTSIDE, NBC ====================================================== AARON BARNHART IN THE KANSAS CITY STAR (a Knight-Ridder newspaper) How to find my articles in the Star archive: (1) Go to http://www.kcstar.com/library/library.htm>. (2) Under the "Additional search criteria" heading, type Aaron Barnhart in the "AUTHOR" entry blank. (3) Click the Search button. Entire contents Copyright 1997 by Aaron Barnhart. All rights reserved. Distributed by e-mail and BBS to over 10,000 readers weekly. Late Show News is made possible with the generous assistance of ECHO, New York City's premiere online service. Send news for and comments about this newsletter to aaron@tvbarn.com